We love music at my house! We listen to it when we cook, clean, workout and relax. If we are in the car, the radio is on. As I was sitting at a red light the other day and humming along to a catchy tune, I look in my rearview mirror and my 2 year old daughter is trying to sing along and clap to it. All of a sudden I really stopped to pay attention to the lyrics I was singing in my daughter’s presence and I felt a sting of guilt. No, the lyrics would not be known as “explicit” on iTunes and no, it did not have any curse words. But would I want my daughter’s head full of this worldliness? If this song was turned into a movie, would I let her see it? Should I be filling my ears with these words? Was it pure, lovely or of good report (Philippians 4:8)? No.
As I was sitting there, 1 Peter 5:8 jumped into my head. It is warning us to always be on alert, because Satan is out there and he wants to get into our lives and destroy us in any way he can. I had thought I was doing a pretty good job at not letting worldliness or Satan enter our lives as much as possible, but that is never enough. You have to check, double check and triple check every area of your life. Satan will not make his entrance known by knocking at your front door. In my case, he made his entrance through my car radio.
Music in and of itself is by no means bad! Music can make you happy, give you energy, make memories and much more that is pure and lovely. But in our world today, it is very rare to turn on the radio and be able to sing a song completely through without turning it off before the curse word comes on. It is normal for the #1 song on the charts to be about drinking, sex, immodest women, or thinking it is “cool” to break the law. This is with every genre of music, too. You can go from a country station to a hip-hop station to a light rock station and they all have unsavory lyrics on them. The songs that I am talking about are not known as the “bad” ones in the world or ones that would be called explicit. But we are not to hold to the world’s standards are we? Here are some examples that I got off the Top Charts List:
Country Music:
- “And Barry White ain’t gonna work tonight if you really wanna turn her on”
(Brad Paisley’s hit song “Old Alabama”). - “Don’t you wanna stay here a little while?
Don’t you wanna hold each other tight,
don’t you wanna fall asleep with me tonight”
(Jason Aldean and Kelly Clarkson “Don’t you Wanna Stay”. No, this song is NOT about a husband and wife). - “Even though I hate to admit it,
sometimes I smoke cigarettes,
Christian folks say I should quit it,
I just smile and say “God Bless”.
Cause I know Jesus He drank wine
and I bet we’d get along just fine,
He could calm a storm and heal the blind
and I bet He’d understand a heart like mine”
(Miranda Lambert’s hit song “Heart like Mine”).
Light Rock/Hip-Hop:
- Kiss me, kiss me
Infect me with your love and
Fill me with your poisonTake me, take me
Wanna be a victim
Ready for abductionBoy, you’re an alien
Your touch so foreign
It’s supernatural
Extraterrestrial
(Katy Perry’s hit, “E.T”). - “Beer bottles laying on the kitchen floor,
if we take them out we can buy some more,
so I doubt we’re going out this afternoon.” (Nickelback’s “This Afternoon”)
These are just a few examples, but I could post many, many more! If you listen to your radio, you have most likely heard one of these songs and have had to change the channel. If you are like me, you can have the catchy tune stuck in your head before you even catch what the lyrics are saying. We have to be on alert, not only for our children’s sakes that are in the car with us, but for our own sakes! As Christians, we cannot be singing along to sinful words. If we want our little boys and young men to treat women with respect and have a pure mind, why would we listen to lyrics like “she was killing me in that miniskirt” (“Something Like That” by Tim McGraw)? If we want our little girls to be discreet and pure why would we let them listen to “I might get your heart racing in my skin tight jeans” (“Teenage Dream” by Katy Perry) or “well you might think I’m trashy, a little too hard core, but in my neck of the woods I’m just the girl next door” (“Redneck Woman” by Gretchen Wilson)?
If you cannot find anything decent to listen to on the radio, plug in your iPod or put in your CD and listen to the music that you yourself know is undefiled. There is a lot of good music out there but just like in every other area of our life, we have to make sure that Satan is not allowing any worldliness to enter into our lives and our children’s lives. Let us make sure that our music choices pass the Philippians 4:8 test, “Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things.”
*Side Note: A great resource for parents to look up new songs and albums is www.pluggedinonline.com.
By Alicia Bookout
Alicia and her husband, Garrett live in Clovis, NM where Garrett is the pulpit minister for 16th and Pile church of Christ. They have one sweet two-year old daughter, Emma. Alicia is a stay-at-home wife and mother. They both graduated from the Bear Valley Institute of Denver.
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I think you’d be better off teaching your kids about how to react when they hear or see inappropriate things on tv, the radio or in person instead of trying to shelter them from it so much. Its impossible to catch everything that might be a negative influence on them. Show them how to deal with it and you won’t have so much to worry about.
Thank you for your timely article. There is good music out there, but we do need to be ever mindful of what we allow into our ears and into our children’s ears. There are times when I’m in the car with one of my kids (they are 16 and 12) and as the lyrics of a new song hit my ear, we have to turn it. They were enjoying the tune, not fully understanding what the lyrics really meant, and I’ll have to explain in the best Christian terms possible, just exactly the song was saying, and then I’ll hear a quiet, “Ohh, I didn’t know it meant that”. We, like you, love to listen to good music, and it’s so sad that it can sometimes be very difficult to find good music! Lol, for a while, my son thought I was just old and didn’t like any of today’s music! We do need to be so careful of what music is in our heads, thank you for your reminder!
An appropriate way to deal with it is to turn it off or change it to something different. By doing that yourself you are teaching your children what to do and shielding them at the same time. Excellent article!
While that’s true, most of that direct teaching happens when kids are older not when they’re toddlers and preschoolers. And it won’t be nearly as effective if they haven’t had some form of that teaching/example the whole time. I don’t think the author is stressing trying to shelter children so much, but rather the examples their parents are being with their choices and making sure it doesn’t contradict with what is trying to be instilled in the home and at church. Alicia is saying, by your example, teach your children what’s appropriate and how to react when its not.
(I was responding to pastelmoon’s comment. I couldn’t see the other ones while I was typing. Just fyi. :))
Thanks for all the encouragement and comments! Pastelmoon: I agree that we will not always be able to shelter our kids from worldliness. You can’t escape it even just going to Walmart. But just like I wouldn’t put an immoral movie on for my kids to watch, I won’t allow immoral music playing if I have the power to turn it off. We should give our kids the tools to be able to deal with worldliness. Like someone already pointed out- being the example and letting your kids see you turn off the bad lyrics is one of those ways to get them prepared to deal with worldliness in their own lives. We are the ones training our kids and their souls are too precious not to shelter as much as possible!
I agree that we need to avoid certain things when it is possilbe but that is nearly impossible in our world. There are many Christians who work in environments that are very worldly but they are not doing wrong by working there. Jesus said you are int the world (around sin) but do not be of the world (do not partake in that sin). Our goal as Chritians is to be spiritually minded and the only way that will happen is by putting spiritual things in our minds. So instead of simply turning the radio to something that is not worldly we need to listen to scripture or to acapella music or to sermons. There are people in our world who do not listen to music nor do they watch television but that does not mean they are spiritual people. Those who are spiritual will fill their minds with godly thoughts and that is the example that we need to lay down for our children.
Very good article Alicia! You are very right about us needing to be an example to our kids, if they see us turn away from evil they will learn to do that themselves. Growing up I don’t so much remember my Mom having to explain to us why a certain song was bad, just seeing her change the station or turn off the radio showed us that some songs weren’t good to listen to. Thanks for making us aware of the little dangers that are in our everyday music. :o)
Thank you Alicia, very good article!!!! I always tell my children (8, 3) that we folow the same rules they do. We don’t allow them to watch bad things and we don’t watch bad things. We don’t allow them to listen to bad things and we don’t listen to bad things. It is not sheltering them it is just the way we need to be. We do discuss with them what “bad” is so they know why we don’t watch or listen to bad things but there is no reason for it to get in their heads first to teach it if we can stop it.
Alicia I love you and thank you for this article. I myslef have recently decided that we no longer play regular music in front of our children. While, yes they need teaching on such topics, the last thing I want coming out of my 2, 4, and 8 yr olds mouth is “Tonight I’m lovin you” Whether it’s a fact of sheltering them too much or not, I’d rather save it for when they can understand what they’re saying and why it’s wrong. Our kids can use a little extra protection these days… Nothing but veggie tales and Classical for me thank you 🙂
Several years ago I went through my music collection and got rid of quite a few cd’s that I had purchased for the clean songs I liked…only to find the whole album was not consistent. I didn’t want children stumbling onto those and listening to filth. I have no kids, but I thought it would be a good idea to start now. I don’t need to hear it either. Little kids repeat everything they hear…good and bad. They will later learn the lessons of what is bad and why. But even if you know how to react to hearing things that are inappropriate, the repetition keeps it in your mind. I remember being in public school I was surrounded by kids who used profanity all the time. I found those words popping up in my mind even in “clean” environments. I agree with Alicia. Turn it off!
Alicia, what an excellent and timely article. As with all things, the Scriptures provide guidance for how we should approach evil influences in life. Concerning some of the comments on your article: I am not ashamed to say that I most definitely want to shelter my children from evil as long as I am able, and then, as they are exposed to and become more aware of various evils in the world, it is also my duty as a parent to expose it for the sinfulness and evilness that it truly is. The degree to which the evil is exposed depends upon the age of the child. In the case of very young children, such as the age of your daughter, we likely don’t need to say anything, but just simply turn the station. However, if they indicate they like and and want that song back, one could simply say “that song talks about things that makes God sad and it will also make Him sad for us to like it and want to listen to it.” THAT is how we begin to teach our children to deal with the world. To say that we should purposefully expose our children to evil so that they will learn how to deal with it is contrary to the Scriptures.
Romans 16:19 “For your obedience is known to all, so that I rejoice over you, but I want you to be wise as to what is good and innocent as to what is evil.”
Ephesians 5:11: “Take no part in the unfruitful works of darkness, but instead expose them.”
Thanks again for a great article!
Such a great article. Thanks for the great reminder to be careful what we are subjecting our children (and ourselves!) to 🙂
Love it – thanks Alicia. I remember when a song by Uncle Kracker called “follow me” suddenly became popular – I was confused about my mom’s reaction to it because I wasn’t old enough to understand that it was actually about a man who was seducing a married woman into an adulterous relationship. My cousin was with us, too, and she said, “Thanks for ruining that song for me, Aunt Linda!” My mother’s response: “No, they ruined it themselves – they could’ve written a song about anything, and they chose to write about that. Wasn’t that stupid? Now you can’t even listen to it!” 🙂
What a wise example. I am so proud of you! What a truly amazing article!! I hope you don’t mind if I share with our ladies bible class here in good ol’ Craig CO! LOVE YOU bunches.
Fantastic article. I will be sharing on facebook and making it “required reading” for my children!
Great article, Alicia, and a timely reminder to us parents that we must be DILIGENT and INTENTIONAL in our parenting and never let our guards down. Just as a side note, much of the popular music today, even if the theme is not ringing immorality, much of it is filling our minds with dark & nihilistic themes, which are still ungodly nonetheless. Philippians 4:8 is a powerful verse to guide us in this battle…thanks for sharing!
I am thankful that you are being diligent with both my granddaughter’s ears and my daughter’s (your) ears to do your best to allow only pure things into them and to keep your hearts and minds focused on wholesome thoughts. Thank you, because you are BOTH precious to me!
1 Thessalonians 5:22
Abstain from all appearance of evil. What better way to abstain than to turn off that which has evil thoughts. Great article Alicia.
Thank you for sharing such encouraging thoughts! I, like you, love listening to music all day long. I get a cheerful feeling and can accomplish my tasks so much easier. ? But, we have to teach our little ones discernment and not compromise. The old adage of “What Would Jesus Do?” applies so well here. Our children our so precious and it isn’t hard to teach them to avoid the nasty songs and to enjoy pleasant songs. It is hard; I remember singing along to so many oldies of my generation and not remembering what the words were actually saying. Yikes! There is so much adult desires stated in songs and we know our little ones do not need to be exexposed to that! God bless you and yours, Alicia!! ?
Sorry about the misspelled word “exposed”. The comment box wasn’t working right and I couldn’t even see what I had typed. ? I want to thank you again for writing such important thoughts!