I can remember when I was a little girl sitting in church and hearing my mamaw sing, “Angry words, Oh let them never from the tongue unbridled slip.”

Today, I can’t hear that song or sing it in worship without thinking of her. It brings her to my mind so vividly it is as if I can reach out through time and stroke her cheek. She was a living example of this song. I can’t think of a single person who didn’t love my mamaw. She was loved and respected by everyone who knew her.

I think back on her life and this song resonates with my heart because I can’t imagine her ever, ever said an angry word. I’m sure there were times when she was angry and that’s not to say she didn’t have problems. It’s not to say that there weren’t big struggles in her life. It is to say, that she had a gentle and tender spirit.

“May the hearts best impulse ever, check them err they soil the lips.”

So now whenever I hear this song, whenever we begin singing it in worship, I am reminded of her gentle spirit. I remember how she gave to others, without expecting anything in return. I think of the smile, laughter and joy she exhibited daily.

But I don’t just think of my mamaw. In thinking of her, I can’t help but think of Jesus. She was a servant of Christ and wanted that to be the choice of her family members as well. I am reminded how much she loved Jesus and wanted to be like Him. I am reminded of how much she loved others.

“Love one another thus saith the Savior,
Children obey the Father’s blest command,
Love each other, love each other,
‘Tis the Father’s blest command.”

So I consider my own heart. I consider whether or not I love others, purely. I think of whether or not I have spoken words of anger and if perhaps in so doing, I have hurt or offended another. I consider whether or not I need to repent.

“Love is much too pure and holy,
Friendship is too sacred far,
For a moment’s reckless folly,
Thus to desolate and mar.”

Anger is a human emotion. We may experience feelings of anger from time to time. We are to be angry and yet, not sin. Which indicates that, in anger, sin may occur. Paul warns us of this. “Be angry, and do not sin” Ephesians 4:26. Clearly, he is saying that anger can be felt, yet we must read the entire passage, in context to understand the overall reaction we are to have. Sadly, this verse is often used as if it’s some kind of badge of honor that allows us to hold anger, to possess it, and to not let go of it.
Isolated, it would seem that the above verse allows one to get angry and hold the anger without considering one’s own reaction to the one with whom they are angry. But the reality is, the above verse, isn’t complete, it’s only half the verse. The other half states “…do not let the sun go down upon your wrath.” This would indicate that you should settle the matter with the one you are angry with before the sun goes down.

But, do you know what? This verse isn’t isolated to a single verse. It is part of a larger context about putting off the former man and being renewed in our spirits so that we are not grieving the Holy Spirit.

The verses preceding 4:26 beginning in verse seventeen lead us to see that we are to put off the former conduct of the old man, and be renewed in the spirit of our minds. Ephesians specifically from 4:20 “…But you have not so learned Christ, 21 if indeed you have heard Him and have been taught by Him, as the truth is in Jesus: 22 that you put off, concerning your former conduct, the old man which grows corrupt according to the deceitful lusts, 23 and be renewed in the spirit of your mind, 24 and that you put on the new man which was created according to God, in true righteousness and holiness.”

“Therefore, putting away lying, “Let each one of you speak truth with his neighbor,” for we are members of one another. 26 “Be angry, and do not sin” do not let the sun go down on your wrath, 27 nor give place to the devil. 28 Let him who stole steal no longer, but rather let him labor, working with his hands what is good, that he may have something to give him who has need. 29 Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers.30 And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. 31 Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. 32 And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.” Ephesians 4:25-32.

We must be aware of how we respond to the emotion of anger. If we become angry, perhaps because of the sin we see surrounding us, we must be cautious in how we address the issue which has caused the anger. “Let no corrupt word proceed from out of your mouth, but what is good for edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers.” verse 29.

Paul warns us to put away from ourselves, anger. In the above passage, verse 31. “Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice.” Ephesians 4:31. Again, in Colossians 3:8 “But now you yourselves are to put off all these: anger, wrath, malice, blasphemy, filthy language out of your mouth. 9 Do not lie to one another, since you have put off the old man with his deeds…,” Paul warns us to rid ourselves of anger. Regarding anger, we aren’t to wear anger as if it’s a right. We are to learn to live as Christ, put away the thoughts of the flesh and be kind, tenderhearted and forgiving, because, we have been sealed for the day of redemption being forgiven in Christ, (verses 30-32).

“Angry words are lightly spoken,
Bitterest thoughts are rashly stirred,
Brightest links of life are broken,
By a single angry word.”

When we allow anger to dwell in our hearts, we open our hearts as a place for the devil, if we aren’t careful our thoughts can change, from anger to bitterness. Bitterness again in verse 31 is to be put away from us, along with clamor and evil speaking and malice. None of these emotions, these characteristics, are reflective of the fruit of the Spirit, but rather, are works of the flesh. Refer to Galatians 5.

Angry words are not words that lead to love. Angry words do not show kindness, gentleness or self-control. Angry words come from a heart that seeks it’s own. As members of the body of Christ Jesus we are to put away from us the anger that comes in to our hearts. We are to control our thoughts and guide them back in to a place of love, offering grace. “Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers.” Eph. 4:29.

Do you consider your words carefully? Do you control your heart when anger creeps in to your mind? Do you remember that you yourself are forgiven of God, and that in return you too should forgive? –

“Love one another thus saith the Savior,
Children obey the Father’s blest command,
Love each other, love each other,
‘Tis the Father’s blest command.”

Copyright:
Angry Words: Written by D.P.K. and Horatio Palmer – Public Domain
Scripture references: The Holy Bible, New King James Version Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc.

Bio:
Renee Aleshire Brown is wife to Michael and mom to Jonathan. They worship with the Pickerington church of Christ in Ohio. Renee and Michael have been married for twenty-two years and continue to grow in love for each other. Through the blessing of adoption, they are joyful to be parents and Renee homeschools in order to provide a customized education in a faith-filled home. She is one of two leaders of the women’s Bible class resource center at Polishing the Pulpit and this year was thrilled to also be asked to speak about homeschooling. Renee is an author and blogger and you can find her writing regularly on her blog Great Peace Academy.