In this final article of this series, I want to focus on the fact that there are differences between males and females, and we need to appreciate that God designed it that way. In other words: Sons and Daughters: Recognize Their Differences. As we bring up our children, we need to let our boys be boys and let our girls be girls.
Boys need to spend time with their dads to learn how to be men. While moms do play a very important part in training their sons, the dad is one who will show his sons how to be a man. Our sons need male examples to learn leadership skills, so that they will learn to be effective leaders of their own families and leaders in the church. Boys need to be able to climb and explore and get dirty. Don’t let your fears of them getting hurt get in the way (within reason – 🙂 ). Bad behavior should not be passed over by saying, “boys will be boys.” Boys need to be taught to use their strength properly, and not abuse it. We need to teach them how to treat females, starting with their sisters and mother. Boys need to be taught modesty and the importance of refraining from crudeness. While it ought not be their primary work, boys do need to learn how to wash dishes, do a load of laundry, and cook a decent meal. It will serve them well if they are equipped to take care of basic needs, so that they do look like a rumpled mess when they need to take care of themselves.
Wrapping It Up
We need to cultivate in our girls the desire to be feminine, but not prissy. We should teach them to dress like a girl, and to look like a girl. I find it sad when little girls look so generic that one wonders if they are a boy or a girl. Our girls also need to be okay with getting dirty sometimes. We must teach them to be modest, both in dress and in behavior. They need to learn that it is not acceptable to cry and whine in order to manipulate others, and that although hormones do make life difficult at times, they cannot be used to excuse sinful behavior. They should learn that flirtatious behavior is not appropriate. Girls need to develop homemaking skills to enable them to organize and run their own home, so that they are well-prepared when they marry. Learning some basic home repair skills wouldn’t be a bad idea either. Who is the primary role model from whom our daughters will learn these things? I don’t know about you, but for me, that causes me to give serious reflection about the example I’m setting for my children.
“Oh that God would give every mother a visionof the glory and splendor of the work that is given to herwhen a babe is place in her bosom to be nursed and trained!Could she have but one glimpse in to the futureof that life as it reaches on into eternity;could she look into it’s soul to see its possibilities;could she be made to understand her own personal responsibilityfor the training of this child,for the development of its life, and for its destiny,–she would see that in all God’s worldthere is no other work so noble and so worthy of her best powers,and she would commit to no others hands the sacred and holy trust given to her.”
Understand Your Role
Cherish Your Children
Sons and Daughters: Recognize Their Differences
Joy and her husband George live and serve as missionaries in Iringa, Tanzania, East Africa. They have four children, and a much-loved son-in-law. You can follow her adventures (and find many wonderful posts) at her blog.