Hollywood tells us that one of the necessities of a happy life is to “fall in love”. Sounds romantic, right? But what do they mean by this? What are the hidden intentions of this cliché? Usually, Hollywood portrays love as an overwhelming state of emotion that can be very strong and lasting, so long as you feel it. They claim that this intense feeling is unbreakable… until you feel like “it’s time for a break”. When you think about this, it doesn’t sound as “unbreakable” anymore. So what can we do about this? If love isn’t a Hallmark movie, then what is it? Well, the Bible gives us a clear explanation. What’s interesting about the history of the Bible, is that the New Testament was originally written in Koine Greek – a language known to be understood by even the simplest of men. God knew that the scriptures of the New Testament needed to be read and understood by all future generations, so He organized them accordingly.

If we look throughout the Bible, we see many stories with their idea centered around love. We’re told to “love our neighbor as ourselves”, and that love is the greatest quality a person can possess. But, if we look beyond English versions and into Greek, we see a deeper meaning to the word “love.” In Greek, love has four primary meanings. Storge, the familial love, can be described as the love found in family relationships. Phileo, the brotherly love, can be found in the bond created through strong friendships. Eros, the passionate love, describes the tie between romantic partners. And finally, Agape, the sacrificial love. Agape is the highest form of love and is defined as wanting the best for another person. With these four Greek definitions of love, we can better understand what love should look like. In my life, I experience these different forms of love every day.

The love I have for my parents and siblings and the way I show it is my daily dose of storge, familial love. Over the years, I’ve learned that the key to showing my love to my family is to simply be there, be an active member of the family, and never lose sight of the importance of doing this. For my fellow teens, we must understand society’s unique pull on us. If you think about it, the media doesn’t do the best job of portraying what a “happy family” looks like. In almost every show, movie, or book with some sort of family representation you can consume these days, the character illustrating the teen is most likely a moody, unpredictable, and/or detached one. We see that society seems to like the idea of stereotyping teens this way, but as Christians, this is harmful to our ability to correctly love our family. I’ve learned that I must break this stereotype by being a present and active member of my family and by maintaining respect through obedience to my parents while keeping a strong relationship with my siblings.

When it comes to phileo, or brotherly love, my personal experience has been a little different than some. Being a preacher’s daughter, I have moved a lot in my lifetime, and that has impacted a good amount of the relationships in my life. I don’t think I can say I’ve ever really had a “best” friend, but as I have grown, I’ve learned to appreciate the relationships I do have. With each congregation I have moved to, my family and I have been welcomed with open arms, and for that, I am forever grateful. Growing up in the church has taught me a lot about what phileo love looks like. The willingness to serve shared between members of the church is a prime example of phileo love for me. I am so grateful to have been able to grow up in the Lord’s church, learning what it means to truly love one another, especially through friendship.

I experience agape love, or sacrificial love, most importantly through God. The love and sacrifice God shows to us is the absolute most amazing example of love one could ever experience. The Bible refers to agape love, along with the three other definitions of love, as a decision, not a feeling alone. This is why Hollywood’s representation of love contradicts the powerful love we are given examples of in Scripture. I

am blessed to be the daughter of two happily married parents, and because of this, I can observe their love for each other. The love my parents have for one another could be defined as a mix of agape and eros – a sacrificial love that is also passionate and intimate. So, now that you know what each of these Greek definitions of love looks like in a person’s life, hopefully, you can understand what God wants us to know about love. Go ahead and watch your Hallmark movie, but just remember, love takes work, it takes sacrifice, and it is a decision. Choose to love with your actions, and let your emotions follow.